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THE
JOYGRAM
from Peggy Joyce, PCC, The Joy Coach
Volume 3, Number 5, November, 2004
NEW
JOYGRAM!
NEW JOYGRAM! NEW
JOYGRAM!
The JoyGram is back. I have been on a hiatus for a few months. Getting
my Groove back. Much of the format is the same. The editor is much
changed. More about that as time goes by.
GROWING THE SUBSCRIPTION LIST
The JoyGram subscription list is growing because
you continue to pass it on even though you haven't seen a new issue
in months. Well, your patience paid off and here it is! Thanks!
OPENINGS
FOR NEW CLIENTS
I now have space in my coaching calendar for a few new clients.
Contact me for a free 30-minute consultation about having the life
you really want. We'll discover if we're a fit. Email Peggy@thejoycoach.com
with Appointment for Free Consultation in the subject line.
COACHING
FROM YOUR STRENGTHS I am enthusiastically
recommending the book Now,
Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham and Donald
O. Clifton. When we start the coaching conversation from the place
of your strengths, the old scripts about what's wrong with you are
dislodged. That creates a lot of passion for doing your life differently
using your own natural, inborn talents.
FREEDOM
REDUX was the last JoyGram issue.
If you don't remember it, check it and other past issues in the
archives on my website.
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
(excerpted and edited from a note to a client)
I
notice how much you love the people in your life and how much you
want happiness for all of them. I notice too that when you think
they are screwing up or feeling unhappy it doesn't feel at all good
to you. Also, when it seems like they want something from you to
make them feel better, it's hard for you. There's a wise part of
you that knows they must make themselves feel better. I hear that
you are asking how you can support them and accept them and not
grieve - or want to crawl away - when you perceive them as hurting,
or angry, or making mistakes.
What
if we are doing relationships in order to discover what we like,
what feels good to us, and how life works best for us? And what
if the only way each one of us can do that is to go through it for
ourselves? What if experience is our only authentic teacher and
instead of hurting when a loved one is going through a painful experience,
we look for and support their learning? What if we say "Sweetheart,
I can't do this for you. I hear that you aren't feeling good and
I also know that feeling happy is your job. It's a job I know you
can do. In the meantime, I can accept and be comfortable with your
unhappiness."
I
can't learn whether I really like chocolate if the only thing I
know about chocolate is you describing the taste of it to me. I
have to actually experience chocolate for myself in order to discover
if I like it. It's fun to know whether you like it too. It's interesting
to hear if you experience it similarly to the way I do. And while
that can influence me enormously, and even make me think
I like chocolate, I still don't know unless I taste it, taste the
varieties of it, really experience chocolate in many ways. It may
even take me a while to discover whether I like it or not.
Would
you deny me chocolate because you have decided you don't like it?
Well, probably not! What if chocolate makes you sick? How would
you feel about me trying it then? Ah, now there's a hook in it!
You really care about my welfare and chocolate has been a feel bad
experience for you. How do you be with that?
When
I'm free to try it for myself, if I decide I like it and you don't
like it, we can just appreciate that we experience chocolate differently.
It's important that neither of us takes the other's preferences
personally. And that neither of us expects the other to eat or to
abstain from chocolate for the sake of the relationship.
Without
our judgments, experiences are just that. Each of us is learning
what feels good and what doesn't feel good. And it's not exactly
the same for all of us. That's why Dr. Phil's "How's that workin'
for ya?!!" is such a perfect question. You notice that he does not
say "How can I make that work for ya?"!!! ;-)
A Noticing: Every moment is new. An opportunity to choose chocolate
or vanilla. Whatever the past held, it's gone.
Peace is NOW. Joy is NOW. Freedom is NOW.
"The Basis of Your Life is Freedom
The Objective of Your Life is Joy
The Result of Your Life is Growth"
-from Abraham, 1991, A New Beginning II, by Jerry & Esther Hicks,
Published by Abraham-Hicks Publications, 2001
NEW CLASSES!
Exciting
new classes are budding. Watch for the announcements here and on
my website:
http://www.thejoycoach.com/coach-teleclasses.html
Ask to be put on the announcement list for classes. Use
this handy form.
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